Purpose in Life

Dear Jon Stewart,

I figure you are the right guy to help me with this, because a lot of people listen to you.  Well, my boss listens to you, and he’s the kind of guy who listens to stuff a lot of other people listen to.

The problem is this.  Could you tell people who are first in line at the left turn green arrow that their only purpose in life is to watch the green arrow light, and go when it turns green?  I mean, it’s fine if they take a second or two to make sure no dickhead is running the red light.  But otherwise, they are not to take their eyes off that light, and then just go for Christ’s sake?

Thanks.  I mean, it just isn’t fair for them to sit there doing whatever else they’re doing, like finding a better radio station or checking their teeth for poppy seeds or whatever, then notice the left turn arrow is yellow, THEN they go, but nobody else gets to.  You see what I mean?

So if you could just mention this, I’m sure it help.  For some people.  For other people, there is just no cure for stupid.

Thanks a bunch,

Cindi

Boonville, IN